The Millionaire Matchmaker

This is the response I received after I informed a woman (though I don’t know her
name, we’ll call her Olivia just to keep the story fluid) that the one year old, 60
pound, totally crazy, jump-all-over-you-knock-you-down bulldog she just inquired
about may not be a good match for her family, that included a little guy just starting
to walk, and another little guy in a child transport device. Forget the fact that he was
already on hold for someone else, and was going to go home later that day.
“She’s right,” I told myself. Who am I to tell her that Olivia can’t take this maniac of a
dog home if she wants to? They are her kids, after all. She can subject them to
whatever she likes. I don’t have children, being in the same room with a baby makes
me uneasy, and carrying on a discussion with a child puts a lump in my throat. It isn’t
that I don’t like kids, it’s I don’t have the experience. Being around children elicits the
type of emotion I imagine my mother would experience when faced with a 100-pound
growling dog. I’d take a breath and hope for the best, my mom would know that the
end is nigh.

I reminded myself that my job is to advocate for the dog. “You shouldn’t feel bad; you
have to think about what’s best for the dog.” I know that. Really, I hate that this
woman is mad at me. I feel saddened that she marched off, instead of letting me
introduce her to some more easy-going, child-loving dogs. I know that she can just
go to a pet store, pull out her credit card, and buy herself whatever adorable little
puppy she wants. Forget saving a life, now this is personal.

I have revisited my interaction with Olivia repeatedly in my head, and I still feel bad. I
have been considering the responsibility that goes into dealing with animals. I’m not
talking about walking, feeding, vet care, I’m talking about the big, life-changing
decisions we make. DECIDING to adopt a dog; DECIDING to get rid of a dog;
DECIDING which dogs are not adoptable. All of these decisions are huge, and my
job is to DECIDE what is best for the dogs in our care, and knowing in my heart that
at the end of the day, I took all the information I had and came to a conclusion that
was in the best interest of the ANIMAL and the FAMILY.

I’m like the Millionaire Match Maker, except I don’t have gorgeous, successful well-
cultured women, I have dogs. And I don’t have millionaires. I have sweet, selfless,
families, coming to me and asking for help making their families complete. I groom
my “dates,” teach them good manners, keep them clean, put a nice collar on them
and make sure they stay happy by meeting their basic needs. I have to get to know
my “Millionaires,” find out what they’re looking for, what fits their lifestyle, and give
them information on how to pick the best match. I have to remind them, that while
this one may have stunning blue eyes and a gorgeous blonde coat, she has the
energy of firecracker and the weight of small horse, both of which she may choose to
pull out on any unsuspecting human bystander. But maybe you should meet this girl,
with nondescript brown eyes, a dull coat that will shine up nicely after a good diet
and a bath or two. This girl will be patient when your little one trips learning to take
her first steps. She will lie patiently at the front door waiting for you to come home.
And when you finally do arrive home, she’ll wait to greet you and you tell you about
her day until after you have put your groceries down. We’ll find a millionaire for that
little firecracker, too.

So, Olivia, here’s what you taught me: I’m not here to make you mad, and I’m not
here to tell you what kind of parent you are. I’ll let you do the parenting, and I’m
going to keep doing the dogging. I don’t know how to handle your child when he has
an epic meltdown because the dog chewed up his favorite toy, but I can help you
find the dog that may not chew up his toys, or maybe even share her dog toys with
your son. I’m here to make a love connection. Show me the shape of the hole in your
heart, and I’ll show you a dog that fits quite nicely. I’m here to find forever homes for
our dogs, and sometimes that means falling in love with your heart, not your eyes. I’ll
trust you to raise your sons to be kind, compassionate, animal-loving gentlemen, if
you trust me to put a dog in your home that will keep your sons safe, happy and
wanting to adopt when they have a family all their own.

Olivia, I challenge you to a rematch.